Shipping &
returns.
We ship worldwide — Canada, the United States, and 233 other countries, including every one nicer than the towns on our shirts. Printed after you order it, posted from somewhere unremarkable, and returnable for thirty days without an interview.
- From
- Somewhere unremarkable, North America
- To
- Your town, wherever it is. Yes, that one.
- Contents
- One shirt. One certificate. No fanfare.
- FreeShipping over $60 USD
- 5–10Business days to print
- 3–35Business days in transit
- 30Days to send it back
The route.
Order to doorstep- You orderday one
Nothing happens for a moment. This is correct.
- It goes to press5–10 days
The shirt is made because you asked for it. Nothing sat in a warehouse hoping.
- In transit3–12 days
Standard post from Florida — three to eight business days inside the US, six to twelve into Canada, thirteen to thirty-five for the rest of the world. Tracking is emailed when the carrier takes it.
- It arrivesa parcel
From somewhere unremarkable, with the certificate enclosed.
Orders placed on a weekend or a statutory holiday start their clock on the next business day. Parcels into Canada run six to twelve days, and the rest of the world thirteen to thirty-five, customs permitting. Genuine takes time.
What it costs.
Rates, plainlyUnder $60 it is a flat $6.95, shown before you pay. Three to eight business days once the shirt is printed. Prices and thresholds are in US dollars, in both countries.
The shirts are printed in Dania Beach, Florida, so a Canadian parcel is an import. Six to twelve business days, customs permitting, and the carrier may collect GST/HST and a handling fee on delivery — those are the recipient’s. We do not mark parcels as gifts and we do not understate their value.
We ship worldwide from Florida: $10 for the first shirt and $4 for each one after it, quoted at checkout. Allow 13 to 35 business days, and expect your country to want its VAT or duty before the carrier hands the parcel over. The free-shipping threshold is a North American arrangement and does not apply.
There is no expedited option, because the honest bottleneck is the press, not the post. Five to ten business days to print is the floor no carrier can move.
Returns.
Thirty days, no interrogationWrite to mediocresouvenir@stratosync.solutions with your order number and which shirt is going back. A person replies within two business days with an address.
Post it back within 30 days of delivery, in wearable condition — unworn beyond trying it on, unwashed. Tags help but are not required; we know what we printed.
We refund the original payment method within five business days of the parcel arriving. Your bank then takes as long as your bank takes.
We cover it
- Arrived damaged or misprinted — send a photograph within 30 days and we replace it. Keep the damaged one; it has been through enough.
- Wrong shirt, our error — return shipping is ours, and so is the apology.
- Tracking has not moved in seven business days — we open a trace, and reprint at our cost if it is lost.
- Cancelled before it goes to press, usually within 24 hours of ordering — refunded in full.
Not a defect
- Garment-dyed colour varies slightly between shirts and along the seams.
- Prints sit a hair off-register. On purpose.
- The cotton relaxes about half a size in the first month of wear.
- None of this is a fault — but if the shirt is not what you hoped for, the thirty days cover that too.
Size exchanges work the same way and take another five to ten business days to print. If you need it sooner, order the new size and send the old one back separately. The size guide exists to make this paragraph unnecessary.
Questions people ask.
Answered without a chatbotDo you ship to somewhere nicer than the towns on the shirts?
Yes. We ship to street addresses in 235 countries, including every one with actual tourism. The shirt will not comment on your surroundings.
How much is shipping?
In Canada and the United States: free over $60 — two shirts, once the multi-town discount applies — and a flat $6.95 below that. Everywhere else: $10 for the first shirt and $4 for each one after. Every figure is US dollars, so a Canadian order is charged in USD too.
How long until it arrives?
Five to ten business days to print, then transit: three to eight inside the US, six to twelve into Canada, thirteen to thirty-five for everywhere else. Orders placed on a weekend or a statutory holiday start their clock on the next business day.
Where does it ship from?
A print shop in Dania Beach, Florida — an unremarkable place, which we consider on brand. Everything ships from there, including the Canadian orders and the ones crossing an ocean.
I typed my address wrong.
Tell us within 24 hours of ordering and we will correct it before the shirt goes to press. After that the parcel is in the carrier’s hands, and a returned-to-sender parcel has to be reshipped at your cost.
What if it does not fit?
Thirty days, no interrogation. Send it back in wearable condition and we refund it. Size exchanges work the same way, though they take another five to ten business days to print.
What if it arrives damaged?
Send a photograph within 30 days and we replace it. You do not need to return the damaged one; it has been through enough.
Tracking has not moved in days.
Tracking can take a day to start reporting movement, which is normal. If it has not moved in seven business days, write to us and we will open a trace with the carrier. A parcel confirmed lost is reprinted and reshipped at our cost.
Will I pay duties?
A US order never leaves the country, so no. Everything else does — it all ships from Florida. A Canadian parcel may be charged GST/HST and a handling fee; parcels elsewhere may be charged VAT, duty, or both. Those are the recipient’s, we cannot waive them, and they are not included in what you pay us. We would rather say this here than let a courier say it at your door.